Review: NFL Rush Zone : Guardians Unleashed – “Knights Of The Sky”

So The Guardians are at the NFL Draft awaiting their award for bravery. A strange kid shows up in their green room and warns them that aliens are planning an attack and the Rusherz are not safe. Rusherz, for your information, are the souls of every NFL team. While The Guardians are on stage, the aliens make their advance in the way of some really strong robots. The Guardians are able to fight them off but only after the kid from the green room shows them how to beat them, shows that he is able to lift things with his mind, and unveils that he is a prince from Anticoria. Anticoria is a planet in deep space that is about to be destroyed. During the battle, all of the Rusherz are captured and flown away in a spaceship.

The Guardians are asked to help save the doomed planet from this threat. To do so they must repair an Anticorian ship that is buried at the bottom of a lake. Two Guardians head down with the prince to assess the situation. As they reach the engine room, more robots (known as blitzborgs) begin their attack. After cycling through their special attacks The Guardians are able to restart the ship and head towards the sky.

Ok, this next part gets a little tricky. As they’re on their course to Anticoria, The Guardians ask what this is all about. Apparently, the Rusherz are from a neighboring planet. The core of their planet kept them happy while they played football. The Anticorians lived in a planet full of war, longing for the happiness of the Rusherz. So Sudden Death attacked the Rusherz and tried to steal the planet’s core. Instead of stealing the core, the Rusherz extracted the core and flew to Earth, where the core was split into 32 shards protected by each NFL stadium. Just as the story ends, Lord Zachtu (sp?) sends his guards to attack the ship. After a brief battle, the ship makes the jump and is able to escape. They land on the planet and expect a hero’s welcome, but instead they are ambushed and are forced to hand over their powers in hopes that they can still save the Rusherz. They’re taken to a prison where they can see the Rusherz being drained of their powers.

The Rusherz are able to escape after one of the rebels makes their presence known. The y crawl through a small hole in the stones creating their cell and head down a narrow passage. This leads them to a cliff that they must jump off of. Thankfully, the prince’s bracelet comes equipped with air brakes and they land safely. Back at home base, the NFL players are trying to devise a plan to help The Guardians and the Rusherz. Collinsworth makes a terrible “zone/man defense” joke. My hatred for him boils. The Guardians head to the rebel base where they are told the story of some cave drawings. These cave drawings are of 6 warriors that defend the planet from evil using specialized tools. The rebels give the tools to The Guardians and now must go on a quest to find the pieces of the anti-core. Back in the prison, the NY Jets Rusher is able to escape and flies away to warn the Guardians of a trap that Zachtu is setting.

The first piece of the anti-core is located in a land of ice. The second is located in the temple of the sky. The third is in the canyon of shrinking rocks. The team splits up and takes on the challenges. After freeing the first piece from the ice the anti-core shows what is happening with the second team. They are able to lift the giant rock and free the second piece. They climb out of the closing canyon and escape. The third team is ambushed by blitzborgs but the Jets Rusher is able to help them fight off the threat. Or so they thought, because some giant rock monsters might have something to say about that. One of the monsters contains the last piece of the anti-core. After a hard fought battle they are able to defeat the rock monsters and combine the anti-core. The ground opens up and swallows the heroes. Zachtu is there and tries to steal the anti-core. The Guardians head towards the forest and open a portal back home. There’s big trouble back on Earth that needs The Guardians attention. Sudden Death is on Earth and he’s battling some NFL players. The battle rages on and The Guardians save the day.

Good Lord that was difficult to watch! Between the sketchy animation and the poor at best voice acting, this special was an hour of my life that I’ll never get back. Basically it was an hour-long Ben-10 episode that was devoid of all laughs and storyline. I held out some hope that because of the NFL name they would have dumped some money into this special, and I’m sure they did. But that money went to the flashy animation and paying for the names on the backs of the jerseys, but nothing that could actually salvage what we saw here. I also held out some hope that the actual NFL players would have had some kind of vocal coaching when they were in the booth. Their lines were canned and terribly executed. Overall a piss poor performance by all involved. Pass on this whenever you get the chance.