Powerful New York mob boss Jimmy Falcone enters the Witness Protection Program and brings his family — wife Cookie, daughters Theresa and Gina, son Anthony, and Uncle Cheech — along for the adventure of a lifetime. Far from New York’s busy streets, the Falcone family arrives in the peaceful town of Oakville, where the pace is far slower and Jimmy doesn’t always get his way.

Spoilers Below

Like many kids in high school, Petey seems to have a hard time finding his click. In this week’s episode of Fugget About It, we see him jump the bandwagon not once, not twice, but thrice. Maybe it’s his low self-esteem caused by his birth name we learn in this week’s episode: Peter Frampton Falcone. Either way, it’s a chain of events sparked by Jimmy, after the Falcone patriarch learns from Uncle Cheech that his first sexual encounter (and reoccurring fantasy) was with a prostitute, complements of his father.

When Jimmy decides to follow suit, he hires a lady of the night for his son, after Petey becomes troubled, after recreating the universe in Theresa’s Dirty Slut brand shoe box. At first, Petey discovers how minuscule his existence is, and gives up on life – that is until divine intervention from “the original MILF” Virgin Mary – guest voiced by Andrea Martin.

Petey then “gets God’d” as he spends his time gay bashing and Molotov cocktailing abortion clinics with his pretty woman, Brenda. Part of the lovers’ montage is dedicated to Jimmy, handing out wads of what’s coloured red to represent the characterless fifty dollar bills. It all unfolds into frenzy, and after being let down by science and religion, it’s up to Jimmy to pick up the pieces. Some of this week’s highlights are inept Petey’s misunderstanding of pie eating and happy endings and the brilliant A Streetcar Named Desire and Pretty Woman references/parodies.

Also, in the opener, we get a glance at the Falcons, er I mean McDougals, learning Canadian English. For example, American cheese is called processed cheese or Canadian bacon is called back bacon or whole milk is called homogenized milk, or homo milk for short. The jokes ensue.

This episode’s business with a shout out to a Canadian celebrity is “Pam Anderson’s Park and Waterslide”… I’m still waiting for an establishment named after William Shatner. Overall, the episode was a great commentary on religion, self-assurance and social interactions between father and son, boy and girl, business and pleasure.

(8.0 out of 10)